iPhone 009

Hey Lady! Hey! Lady! We’re telling! not fair!


Does anyone like a tattletale? Maybe this goes back to playground 101, but I’ve never been a fan of tattlers.

Did you know that kids have nothing on cows when it comes to ratting out their friends? It’s true. And, just like with people, some cows tattle more  than others. But unlike people, cows are kind of funny when their sense of fairness is violated.

I knew right off something wasn’t quite right when both herds were bunched up by the front fence of their pastures. As soon as they saw me, the indignant bawling began.

Apparently I’ve been elected to right the injustices in their world.

What’s the big injustice? Ask Regina. She’s pretty, sweet, shy and ladylike.  She’s also super-smart in ways I have to admire, but don’t always appreciate.

Previously, I noticed some footprints in the garden that were a little large for our dainty-hooved deer. Only thing, everyone’s right where they’re supposed to be; inside their respective fences. Curious and more than a little concerned, I tracked the prints straight to the pasture fence.

The Ladies paid me zero attention, focused as they were on stuffing their faces. All but one that is.  Regina.

Regina was watching my investigation intently from a distance.  Hmm.  Clue?


Miss Regina pretending to be busy: Not so innocent


Next morning, all was peaceful, except for one thing. Regina was grazing with the rest of the girls, but on the wrong side of the fence. Gently, without getting anyone excited, I guided her back inside through the gate. Battery still charged, wire still hot but a little tangled, I figured she got a good shock when she slipped the fence and wouldn’t be trying it again.

It looked like my theory was correct and several days passed with no further incident.

Problem solved, right?  Not so fast. Last night, wires were down and  tangled again and a few telling manure piles were found in places they shouldn’t be. Amazingly, Regina was inside the pasture, right where she was supposed to be.

So it seems I have a cow who not only lets herself out, she lets herself back in. Ask her about it and Regina innocently blinks her long lashes and licks your hand.  Slick.

Yesterday, I watched Regina carefully from afar. I was fussing around doing chores in the pasture and eventually she forgot I was there.  Sure enough, I saw her slip out, then back in when she saw there was a fresh delivery of her favorite mineral blocks. I swear I even saw her whistling…

It’s a quiet, peaceful little crime, but the herd is onto her.

They say it’s an outrage – the UNFAIRNESS!  Listen up Lady we have demands!

I hate to break it to them. Life’s not fair. I wish it wasn’t so, but that’s just the way it is. Can we please now move on and turn our thoughts back to the fresh grass you’ve been looking forward to all winter?

The grass is delicious on both sides of the fence … see? Fingers crossed my little pep talk works. The last thing I have time for is a whole herd of escape artists…

Want more cow tales?

In which Saralee has a crush
in which we ask: boss or bellwether
in which we give thanks for good friends

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s